This is me flying kissing goodbye to ever finding my true love...
Cause dating advise from friends start mostly like...Girl be yourself, but a very watered down version please...
1. You be too nice you get friend zoned and will end you hearing all about the next girls he will ever date.
2. You become too mean, he will run away and never look back.
And then there are my absolute favorites.
3. Don't flirt like you would, flirt like one of Jack's French girls...cause otherwise you will end up making a full blown chicken roast out of the poor guy and people will find him rocking himself in the corner of a dark room mumbling your jokes to himself and crying for his momma.
4. Don't be too friendly and call the guy bro, you will end up being bro-zoned(trust me it's an absolute horrible place to be).
5. Don't be too cute cause then you will become baby-zoned(like bro-zoned but this is like the children's version of a sugar-baby relationship, works for some but so not for me- been there-done that-burnt that bridge).
6. Finally don't be all of the above.
Yes, I am that capable that I can be all of the above in a blink of an eye.
Incidentally I had a crush some time back and tried being all this, but alas... I don't think it's working. Either my crush meter is broken or I have a seriously bad type.
Either way I am done!
Done and done...
In other news I have again started writing, so crazy cat lady life here I come...
#suchamanalithingtodo
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